Manon St-Jules

Actor + Host

Q: What does 50 feel like for you?
A: It feels a little scary. Scary because it’s a definite marker of how quickly time flies and how brief our time on earth is. There’s an urgency now. No more time for bullshit or for '“dicking around.” For someone who’s really good at putting things off, I’m feeling like I have no choice, now, to face whatever I need to face to get to where I want to go. And facing things is scary too.

Q: What’s the best part of being 50?
A: Understanding yourself more fully. And with more acceptance.

Q: What’s your least favourite part of being 50?
A: Perimenopause!! It’s completely astounding to me how poorly the medical world is able to help women through this period of life. Navigating symptoms is really hard and dealing with doctors’ ignorance about them is utterly maddening.

Q: What words or adjectives would you use to describe 50?
A: Transition. Recalibration.

Q: How is turning 50 different from turning 30 or 40?
A: It’s different because 50 is considered mid-life, and when you get to that middle mark, psychologically, you feel like you’re entering new territory. So there is something newer about being 50. And new can feel exciting… but also unsettling.

Q: If you could magically go back to a younger version of yourself, would you?
A: I hate to admit it but yes, I’d love to be 40 again. This feeling however is more about my relationship with time, rather than my relationship with myself. I feel better with myself at 50… but my anxiety about how quickly time is going by is substantial and weighty. 

Q: If you could give your younger self advice, what would it be?
A: You know what you’re doing, so trust your instincts. And focus more on being kind rather than outside considerations (like building a career, for example) because the outside stuff will inevitably develop as a function of the kindness.

Manon can be found online here.